The Circumstance
I have had many roommates in my life, all of whom have brought a lot of growth in my character. Roommates are good for that. Living in close quarters with others causes rough edges to be worn down. I have said that roommate living is good practice for marriage. I always imagined being married to a man who is my best friend and, like a roommate, we would have a lot of fun together, but with the added bonus of getting to have hot, godly sex. However, I am not still living with my college roommates. At some point, our lives took different courses; we made decisions apart from one another. Also, when I was dealing with serious stuff I didn't run to my roommates for comfort and prayer. Maybe it's just my personality, but I got alone and dealt with Lord about it on my own. And if I really got mad at a roommate I could just ignore them until someone moved out. So if I really think about it, if marriage is just having a roommate I get to have sex with, then when I was living with roommates in college I was just practicing for divorce (or an empty, lonely co-habitation).
The Word
Mt 19:16-22
Now behold, one came and said to Him, “Good Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life?” So He said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. But if you want to enter into life, keep the commandments.” He said to Him, “Which ones?” Jesus said, “ ‘You shall not murder,’ ‘You shall not commit adultery,’ ‘You shall not steal,’ ‘You shall not bear false witness,’ ‘Honor your father and your mother,’and, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” The young man said to Him, “All these things I have kept from my youth. What do I still lack?” Jesus said to him, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions.
The Application
The rich young ruler in this passage didn't choose to surrender all for the greatest gift in return. He was too stuck in his independence to fully commit to Christ. He wanted his independence but also the fruit of a deep relationship. I am not co-habitating, I am married. Two becoming one is no longer a natural and easy response like it was meant to be before sin entered the world. I must overcome unhealthy fear. I must face the pain and let the Holy Spirit heal wounds of my past in order to have a future with my husband. I must trust that the Holy Spirit cares about my marriage more than I do and that He can do a greater work in my marriage than I can, if I let Him through prayer and patience. I must become vulnerable to my husband, and forgive him when, not if, he hurts me because he is human. In order to have a healthy, Christ-centered marriage, I want to share the deepest parts of my soul with my spouse. He shouldn't have to learn about what is going on in my life, spiritually or otherwise, after the fact, when I already walked through the tough stuff without him. He wants to be apart of it. And he certainly shouldn't have to wait to read about it in my blog. And why, if it seems so hard to do, is it worth it? Because I, like all women in their honest moments, yearn to be truly known and deeply loved. But I can only go as deep with my husband as I have gone with the Lord. It's all about me and my openness to the Lord. The rest is all about Him. I'm sure glad He's trustworthy.
Fantastic :)
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